Self doubt SUCKS!

So here we are at the end of the second week of nursing school, the second week people. I have expierenced an influx of emption. I kinda hate it. Dea left 3 days into school starting and for the most part it hasn't been too bad. Well ok besides the kids running around screaming and fighting while I'm trying to take at home test. The kids are doing their best to help me with each other and taking on more responsibility while I check out and study. But OMG, my house is sooo gross. I have to tell myself that it will probably come to the point when I will have to sacrifice a shower so I may have to sacrifice the house up keep. GROSS. I've been finishing working the weekend shifts, boy am I tired. I have worked the last two weekends friday and saturaday nights. Sunday I feel mushy and drained, no will power to study. This week is clinicals. CLINICALS. Callie has talked of clinicals for two years now I get to. Friday I had a breakdown and actually spoke the words "I can't do ths." I have never said that. If you know me or read my blog, you know I have always said that I will be a nurse! Saturday a friend of mine came to me and said she was jealous I was in. At that moment I started getting teary eyed and remember what it was like to feel that way, and say that to EVERY other person in before me. So I'm gonna suck it up. NO MORE COMPLAINING. I have been through much worse and getting through nursing will not be the thing that breaks me. Screw that!! So Attention all haters... I am not going anywhere!!